3 posts from November 2008

“Enjoy everything from a nagging spouse to the traffic jams” was the line that I heard in the discourses of one of the saint and kept wondering “how”. Is it possible for anyone to enjoy the circumstances he least want to be in? Even the slightest of the criticism, ignorance, misbehavior, crisis and even the slightest shift from our daily routine disturbs us to the extent that instead for thinking the better side of it we actually turns the whole system upside down to revert the situation.

I kept thinking about it until one day when I myself experienced the pleasure in one of the odds. It happened so that my father got transferred to another town. It was almost a mid of the session when I was admitted to the new school. Near about half of the course was over which was required to be coped up and on the top of that half yearly exam dates were been displayed on the notice board. The pressure was too much for me to be handled and it increased when I found nobody in the class was ready to help me except few kind hearted ones. Actually they were not ready to accept a new face in the class at this point of time. The groups were already been made and the like ones had selected their friends. From their expression it seemed that I have to really prove my worth to make a space among them. I was terribly missing my old buddies and literally blamed my father for my loneliness and pressure.

Seeing no other outlet with whole heartedly I concentrated on my studies and started preparing for approaching exams. Soon the class tests were announced as the course of most of the subjects for half yearly exams was over. . My teachers were quite supporting and arranged the best they could for me. Thanks to the few friends who really helped me and cared for me. The rest seemed to be like little devil who did their best to make my life a hell with their mocks and comments. There was no use to enter into the verbal battle with them and so I decided to reply them back in more appropriate way. I pretended to ignore them for that moment and to get rid of their howling I devoted myself totally to the books.

Class test were started and I due to my night and days struggled managed to get almost highest marks in most of the subjects. This increased my confidence and my classmate’s jealousy. They were not able to appetize that I, who came so late in the class, was coming up with flying colors inspite of all their torturous efforts. But this time I was untouched with their terror and misbehavior. Each time I scored highest there came a sense of immense pleasure in shattering their hopes of my downfall. I was enjoying and happy even with their hatred for me, may be it was because I proved myself and made them realize that their unfriendly attitude hardly creates any difference to me and my aim remains unshaken. The trend continued and to everybody’s surprise I scored highest in the class in the half yearly exams. I apologized to my father for blaming him for my odds and thanked him because if he would not have taken the decision to move from the city, I would have never been able to meet up with my abilities and strength. I became the apple of the eye of every teacher and soon whole of the class became my friends but the one who helped me from the day one always held a special place among my friend list.

This is how my worst circumstances made me grow the most. From that day onwards I find a new challenge in anyone’s jealously for me. My enthusiasm and excitement gets doubled and the envy becomes the source of inspiration for me. I fight with the patience and faith that one day the other person’s anger will change into love for me. But I don’t stop myself from growing no matter how big the problem is. So never blame any of the day in your life saying that “today is a bad day for me” as each one has got something to be taught and with lots of the opportunities.

Published in Kormangala Times, Banglore.

My puppy, Tenzy small, sweet, cute, humorous and was shining white in color. He was just few days born when brought to the house. From the day one he became centre of attraction. When left in our lush green garden to play, it seemed as if a big white cotton ball is rolling with three black spots.(two brilliantly shining eyes and a nose) Tenzy amused everyone in the family and everyone loved him as a family member. He was clever enough to make out the position of each member in the family. From his action it seemed that he always respected papa and whole day followed my mom just like a small kid. I was in 5 standard at that time and so he treated me as a friend of his age group and fought with me at times for his share. He shared my bed, my room and my friends as well. In fact he became very popular among the colony. Even he understood that Rampher was the servant in the family and never allowed him to sit on his chair.

When guests used to come to the house, Tenzy welcomed them and like everyone he also used to sit on the sofa chair to be the part of the discussion. Like a keen listener he used to turn his face every time to the speaker as if he understood everything. At times also responded by his boo-woo which made everyone laugh and Tenzy really enjoyed this attention of everyone which he expressed by somewhat dancing in some peculiar way. When scolded by my father sometimes because of being very notorious, Tenzy use to hide between the feet of my mother. He felt it to be the safest place in the whole world.

Once my brother, who was studying in other town gave us a surprise visit. He went in the bedroom where my mom was knitting and lied with his head at the laps of my mom. My mom who got extremely happy kissed and caressed my brother. Tenzy was observing every thing. After few minutes my brother got up to get freshen up and was about to get up to prepare some snacks. But before she could move Tenzy rushed to the bed and lied in the same position on my mother’s lap as my brother did. This made all of laugh and he was not ready to get down until my mom caressed him as well.

Still I remember that once I met with a severe accident and my white dress turned to red as I was bleeding profusely from head. When after stitches I was brought back to the home Tenzy sensed the tension in the family. He saw me lovingly and waved his tail. His face and whole body was radiating immense, pure love which made me realize how worried he was for me. Tenzy left his food for two days until I kept my first step over the floor and also through out the week he sat in my room while I rested there most of the time sleeping.

Later on my mother developed some allery from Tezy’s hairs and doctors asked her to remain away from him. With a very heavy heart we gave our beloved pet to my cousin who lived in the other town. The whole house and colony got grief strucken for weeks and it became very difficuilt for us to be normal again. After a year we visited our cousins. My eyes were eagerly searching for Tenzy. Suddenly we saw him on the terrace watching us like a statue. He was not tied but still got stuck to the place he was. We called him but of no use. Finally my father went to him and picking his front limb made him walk towards us. He literally dragged Tenzy as he was not making any movement from himself. It seemed that he was not able to believe that he would see us again. Slowly Tenzy realized that what he was seeing was real. He was extremely happy as if gone mad. His tone changed like when we get heavy throat out of the pressure before crying profusely. Everybody sensed that Tenzy was crying and asking “Why! Why you left me, what is my fault.” The whole atmosphere became emotional and there was a thin line of tear in everybody’s eye. For the next two days of our stay Tenzy never left us alone and specially my mom. When she went to the bathroom Tenzy stood in front of the gate and barked continuously. Also he hided one of the slipper of my mom and whenever she changed her saree, Tenzy used to sit upon it out of the fear that now we would leave him and go.

We could not leave Tenzy there even though my cousins also loved him as their own family member and cried on the decision that Tenzy would join us. It was hard decision but on that day one creature was most happy and that was Tenzy of course. Such is the love of a pet, selfless, condition less, boundless, priceless, and endless, and that too without any expectations from the other side. Will ever a human race will be able to develop such virtues? If you are feeling lonely and stressed adopt a pet and you will never be depressed again in life. What all of us ultimately want in life? Pure, selfless love. After that till the time Tenzy was with us, he render his love and services with great devotion and sense of duty. May God rest his soul.    

Published in Koramangala Times, Banglore.

After few months of my marriage my parents suddenly grew older. The reason could not be understood. It is obvious that old age in itself is biggest illness but in case of my parents age cannot be blamed totally. Mom developed a heart problem and my father suffered from slight effect on memory. Me, my brother and sisters being quite far from them, arranged the best doctors in the city for parents, but were not able to come to them immediately. The treatment got started but there was no remarkable improvement. Then I decided to visit my parents’ in order to check what the matter was exactly. To my surprise health of my parents got noticeably deteriorated. They lost weight, health and all enthusiasm.

I decide to stay for some time to look after them. Although I was able to extend my stay for 15 days but within a week my parents got much active and healthy than I and doctor expected. I was quite satisfied and happy while leaving home as my parents recovered eighty five percent and were quite confident. This incident made me realize that children are the actual source of energy for parents.

My parents who were suffering due to bad health from months magically overcame it when I visited them in just a fortnight. What does this mean? They actually needed that emotional confidence and not long medical prescriptions in order to be healthy again. Since then I made a point to call my parents and in-laws at least once in a day, and if not long then at least for two minutes. This unseen connection between me and my parents give them a sense of nearness, love, affection and care from miles away and also a reason to take a very good care of them self. 

I narrated my experience because like my parents there are many old aged couples who are leading their life alone, miles away from their children since children are working in some other country or town. When asked to settle down with children they refuse, not because their kids do not love them or incapable to take care of them but because they become so much acquainted with their surroundings that there develops a comfort zone for them. They have got a circle in the native place, everybody knows them and things get much easily approachable. Considering their comfort it doesn’t seems to be a wise decision to move the parents from their native place to an unknown place, especially when both partners are working. But now as we can see that in the cities the risk for old couples is increasing day by day. News papers tells us the story that how murders of old people is being followed with thefts. It really becomes dilemma to leave parents alone even.

The best that we can do is to be in touch with them as much as possible as our phone calls and visits act as lifeline and fills them with the magical feeling called self confidence. They get energized with zeal and life. Simultaneously we have to be prepared for day when the charge of being parents of your parents has to be taken. It is when parents won’t be able to take the things on their own anymore. On that day when they will be kids once again we have be more responsible and as kids are never left alone so with love and care from nuclear families we have to shift to joint family. The only thing required is tolerance, love and patience.

Whenever you feel lack of these virtues while dealing with your old parents who grow stubborn with age then just imagine that how your parents tolerated you with the same virtues when after drenching the whole bed at the mid night you cried for the whole night at the top of your pitch and your parents passed another sleepless night in comforting you singing lullabies. How without giving a second thought your father cancelled his urgent meeting when your mother told that you have got to be taken to the doctor for vaccination. How your mom delayed to buy a pair of footwear to watch you playing video game on your birthday. How your parents sacrificed all their luxuries in order to secure your future funds. How your mother announced that she never liked pancakes seeing three pieces for four people. Examples are uncountable.

With every passing moment the time that you can be with your parents is reducing. One day as per the law of the world they will be gone for ever. So give them as much happiness as you can. Remember your parents are your real treasure, once lost never be back and nothing else can ever replace their place so keep them safely.    

Published in Koramangala Times, Banglore.